DEAR ABBY: This letter is embarrassing to write. When calling in a fast-food order, my husband wants me to ask the price of each item and becomes upset if they vary from the online menu price. I understand that in this economy, there are bound to be increases.

One day, the difference was about $5. Because I didn’t question it, a heated argument ensued. He said, “Just forget it!” (I called back and said my husband no longer wanted it.) These fast-food places are busy and short-staffed. I don’t think it is right to bug them further. Also, I had a stroke and can’t do fast math in my head. We have the money, or I wouldn’t place the order.

DEAR TAKEOUT: It goes without saying that from now on your husband should be the one ordering the fast food. If he needs it to be a team effort, he can dictate the numbers for you to write down and add them up himself. I do not think his comments about your walking away and leaving him are helpful, unless he is this controlling in other aspects of your marriage. Remind him that if the root of your disagreements is money, a divorce would be far more expensive than marriage counseling. Then ask your doctor for a referral.

DEAR ABBY: I enjoy your column and read it often. I feel compelled to comment on the letter from “Regretful in the Midwest” (June 11). I feel you didn’t go far enough in regard to that letter from the mother of a transgender adult whose new co-worker made fun of transgender people in front of her and, presumably, others. Actions such as these are no longer tolerated in the workplace, and she should report it to her supervisor or human resources if there is another occurrence. (She could even do it now.) She certainly does not need to disclose her personal situation. — KEVIN H. IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR KEVIN: Thank you for writing. The comments I received about that letter were informative. Many readers informed me that the term I used in reference to trans people – gender identity disorder – is outdated and no longer in use. With the American Psychiatric Association’s publication of DSM-5, the term was eliminated and replaced with “gender dysphoria,” articulating explicitly that gender nonconformity is not a “disorder.” I should have known better. Mea culpa.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 60-year-old divorcee. I am currently dating a Danish man and have been for a year. He asked me to marry him several months ago, and I said yes. He wants me and my daughter to move to Denmark. My daughter is 21 and high-functioning autistic, but she still needs me to help with executive functions.

Several months ago, I lost my second job. I got behind on my rent and was evicted. My daughter and I had no place to go and went to live with a friend in another state. When I asked my fiancé if he could please help me a little, he refused and became angry, saying he didn’t want to be a sugar daddy.

He tells me often how much he makes and what he has in the bank. I told him I wasn’t asking for jewelry or fancy clothes, just $2,000 so we wouldn’t lose our home. He told me to ask my ex-husband for the money. Because he refused, my daughter and I were evicted from our home. I eventually found a second job, but the damage had been done.

At the beginning of our relationship, I was upfront about my daughter most likely needing to live with us and asked if it was a deal-breaker. He said no. Now, he wants her to get out as soon as possible, in a foreign country where she doesn’t know the language and has her issues. He also told me I couldn’t keep my cat. When I expressed how this made me feel, he became angry and told me we were through and he wasn’t going to help me.

I am not the kind of person who would take advantage of anyone. I have always worked hard. I feel that family should help each other, and, because we are engaged, our problems should be shared. I don’t know what to do about our relationship now. My daughter is also hurt that he doesn’t want her to be with us. He has said if she stayed, he would get his own apartment. Advice? — GOING ABROAD FROM MARYLAND

DEAR GOING: How many red flags do you need? Your fiancé is tight with money even when he knows you are drowning. He has no intention of living under the same roof with your daughter, who may be unable to adjust to that new society. Understand that if you move to Denmark, he isn’t going to change. This is who he is. For your daughter’s sake and your own, end the engagement. This is not the kind of husband you need.

DEAR ABBY: There’s a boy in a grade above me. When he gets mad that a girl doesn’t like him or his friend, he slut-shames them and calls them whores. Girls in my grade have tried to shake it off, but it won’t stop. We don’t want to resort to violence, but we might have to. What should we do? — AT OUR WITS’ END

DEAR WITS’ END: Violence is never the answer. The girls who have been slut-shamed should tell their parents what has been going on and then inform the teachers and the administrators of your school. In the good old days, that boy’s mouth would have been washed out with soap.

© 2025 Uexpress